A Twisted Tale Spin
by Steahl
Summary: What if Baloo was never the hero? This is a series of vignettes based on the idea that Don Karnage could be a better role model and far more attractive option than a lazy pilot.
1. Tale's Start

**Disclaimer:** Disney owns all characters and the show Talespin, I simply write.

 **Author's Note:** I started these vignettes to make a friend happy and then said friend went away. I enjoyed writing them, and I have trouble writing for myself alone, so I'm posting the first here to see if there's people interested in reading a Talespin AU where Don Karnage is the hero/love interest. They will not follow any real sequential order being vignettes but I will try to state what time they are in at the start or each. Please let me know if it's worth posting the others I have and then continuing!

 **Every story has a start**

 **Who:** Rebecca Cunningham & Guest Stars

 **When:** The day after Rebecca finally makes it safely to Cape Suzette (in AU LAND!)

 **What:** She wants to strangle a pirate captain. And her pilot. And ANYONE ELSE IN LINE NOW. First she was delayed in her arrival to take over a business by a kidnapping on the way in and now _this_?!

"Mail callll!" Baloo drawled from his spot out on the dock. "Already got it coming in huh? Wouldja look at that? A secret admirer? Gotta hand it to you Beckers, you work _fast_."

"Just put it any...what are you talking about?" Rebecca poked her head out the window to glare at her pilot. "I...what is that?!"

"Chocolates, ma'am?" the mailman after after peering at the package in his hands. "And a letter."

"Hmmph. I ordered a desk." She glared at the package then sighed and took it from the poor, quacking bird of a mailman.

"Hey now," Baloo laughed. "Maybe someone just wants you to relax!"

"I don't have TIME to relax! AND MOVE THOSE BOXES IN!"

"Keep your shirt on Beckers, I'm getting to them!" The bear laughed and leaned back against a piling as his eyes slipped closed. Kit had the lady's kid off running around like a maniac or something, no deliveries except into the office...yeah, definitely time to take a nap.

Inside the office was a different story though. No one who knew Baloo would recognize it now with the cleaning and rearranging Rebecca had been doing. She was a terror with a broom and...now she was leaning against the windowsill and staring at the box of chocolates in her hand. Who in the world? She...didn't know anyone here! That was the point of buying a business in Cape Suzette!

No reminders of past mistakes. No disapproving family of her ex. No one trying to get their hands on Molly...

...and certainly no idiotic romance ideas.

Right, time to start with the letter then. With a sigh she set the box aside and tore the thick envelope open. That was the last thing she remembered doing, coherently, for a moment as her eyes glued themselves to the opening lines.

 _To my dear once-prisoner,_

She could feel her fur trying to stand on end as the implications in that one line slammed into her. HE knew where she WORKED. Like watching a train wreck though she couldn't help but read on, lip caught in her teeth...

 _I hope this letter finds you well and such. As you had no immediate family not on my ship we had issue ransoming you, as you were wise to point out, we'll consider this a trial run! Also, my compliments to your child, she has very sharp teeth. You'll be glad to know none of the crew needed stitches but some bandaids were billed to your tab._

Trial run? That was...that was..."TAB?!"

 _As you are well aware profit is necessary for business, we charged you a flat kidnapping fee as well as including an itemized list of amenities provided to you while you were in our care. For starters, Oxygen. At our standard height above sea level the air can be quite thin! Given that you did not pass out and die you obviously enjoyed the benefits of atmosphere held in our cabins!_

The page crinkled in her hand as that ludicrous claim started the list and she almost yelled out the window to ask how high a standard flight could go. Almost. There was more to read.

 _As you barricaded yourself into my cabin you were billed for a five star bed as well as the silk sheets. Quite comfortable I know, it's obvious you are attracted to quality! I understand the billing may be a bit strange to you but that is why I wrote this letter._

Bed? Sheets?! SHE'D LOCKED MOLLY AND HERSELF IN FOR THEIR SAFETY! Was he going to charge her for the...

 _As removing you did quite some damage to my door you were charged for that as well. Ratchet assures me his repair estimate is reasonable and offers installment plans on his services. Also in this same vein is the repair work to the hallway after you ignited the gun powder stores and the return and reattaching fee for the escape raft. I understand that bringing my pod back through the Cape Suzette blockade may seem a little beyond your skill set so I have also included a full replacement fee should you choose to do so. I like oak with brass fittings in the case of replacement._

She couldn't help it, she giggled at that. No matter that he'd made yesterday a nightmare if he could just _see_ where she was setting up shop now he wouldn't even dream of something so fancy! Though...this was a pirate. He would always dream of fancy things wouldn't he? "The one we got out on was pine," she sniffed.

 _Also, your daughter stole the apple from my lunch. Fresh fruit is at a premium up here, that will be sadly costly for you. Despite these stacking fees it was an honor and a pleasure to play host to you and your daughter and we hope to see you again soon!_

...had he followed the mailman?! She couldn't help but peek out, just in case. It was silly of course, no pirate was making it past those harbor guns but...she had to check.

 _Attached you'll find the cost lists and we accept checks payable to me._

Was he actually...? Yes, there, an address! She could give this whole letter to the police and they'd lay a trap for the pirate certainly!

 _Also, do not be thinking this is an address where you can find us, we'll just be watching._

 _Sincerely yours,_

 _Don Karnage, Pirate Captain._

He...they...the letter crinkled in her hand as she tried to get her temper under control but..."THAT IS THE DUMBEST BUSINESS PLAN EVER!" she had to say it. It was. The trumped up charges, the poorly written lists...was every business in the area floundering due to incompetence?

 _P.S - As such a pleasant hostage we have included this complimentary box of chocolates. They are not poisoned, we just couldn't tell which ones had coconut in them so they are all yours._

"IDIOTS!" Everyone. Everyone around her since she headed for this place was just full of...idiocy! They wouldn't get a cent out of her, naturally, and she just had to...never leave the island again? She...she didn't know. Grumpily she nibbled on a chocolate and eyed the letter again.

It felt...oddly...like this was an attempt to save face. She had some experience with male pride, and this captain hadn't managed to keep one little business woman and one little child safely contained. Well then. Fine.

She'd _earned_ some chocolate, yes, thank you.


	2. Company Town (pt 1)

**Author's note:** For those who are unfamiliar with the concept, company towns are just that. A town run and owned by a small company. It was common in some eras, people who worked there often earned housing, food, etc for their labor but the company owned literally everything. Community events, restaurants, everything was run and maintained in adjunct to the company. Sometimes workers would even be 'paid' in town specific currency redeemable only in the company lands. A good reference song for this is 'Sixteen Tons'.

 **Just a Company Town (pt. 1)**

 **Who:** Bebe Don & Crew  
 **When:** Several years before the terror of Don Karnage  
 **What:** Some kids have a dream, but one of them has a proper _plan_.

"Wake up," Don nudged Dumptruck and then moved along to the next bed in their work dorm. "Four am, up up up!" God he hated morning shift but until they were old enough to cut loose the orphanage was just a glorified labor house. And if they missed the call at the factory then the house harpy didn't get her money.

And then no one got to eat.

To be fair, the harpy didn't eat either then, but it was morning and he wasn't feeling charitable. "UP! MUFFINS IN FIVE YES?!" The youngest set in the next dorm over had managed to make edible muffins, and starting a shift with something in their stomachs kept everyone out of trouble. "Except you, you stay here Jock. Yes, we'll bring you muffins, you watch Dumptruck today!" He watched the stocky child slip between the cots to help Dumptruck sit up before nodding and following the rest downstairs.

Sure, being two people down was tough, but they'd learned early after the large boy's injury that he couldn't be left alone.

He managed to keep his grumbling and snarling down until they were past the other dorms, then he was as grumbly and snarly as the rest. God he was starting to understand why people drank coffee despite the taste with these early mornings. "NO THAT IS FOR-oh, yes, good morning Mrs. Perse. Yes, yes, we did, please, um, that is for Dumptruck. Yes, I mean Thom, but we're calling him Dumptruck and...yes, sorry we woke you up please go back to bed we're leaving yes yes?" He watched Gibber skitter back up the stairs with the rest of his group's breakfast then offered a grin to the lady who kept a roof over their head. "LEAVING MEN! NOW!"

Yes, out the door and tearing down the dark streets of their tiny little town. For a free island it wasn't much; the only employer of note was Kahn industries and they were building planes. The whole island was geared toward impressing the new owner and pumping out better, faster planes. Hell, the orphanage was full of kids who lost a parent or two under the old owner; the new one couldn't be worse right?

Sure.

"NO! NO NO NO NOT YOU NOT THERE! YES BACK!" It was important to keep _his_ crew together because no one else really knew how to work with them and getting one kid mixed up in another group of kids could mean terrible things!

"You! Loud mouth!" the foreman pointed across the yard then looked at his lists, "And that group you got there, Bay 7! Ductwork!"

"What? I AM DON! You know that! We have...Bay 7?" No one went to Bay 7. It was an empty bay. What were they laying duct work for? A ghost plane?

"Yeah, small crew, Bay 7, that's the list. MOVE IT!"

Despite himself he felt a shiver go down his spine at that tone. How did the foreman _do_ that?! He was going to learn, yes. He NEEDED to know how to do that. "YOU HEARD HIM CREW!"

"Yeah Don, yeah, we heard! GOING NOW!"

Don flashed a grin around as the boys headed out then scampered ahead so he could be the FIRST one in Bay 7. Seriously, who wouldn't want to know? It was Bay 7 it was LEGEND and STORY and..."Empty?"

The boys peered through the bay doors as well before Ratchet finally kicked a stone through. The sudden noise of it rattling off the far wall made them all wince, "What?" Matty Dog whined, "It coulda been invisible!"

"You're crazy Matt, Shut up I am thinking now!" Don slapped the boy as a matter of course while the rest took up the call of 'Mad Dog Mad Dog Matty!'. That was just how it worked some days.

"Shut up brats!" The head engineer spoke from behind them, "It hasn't been built yet. Foreman says you've got a good group that can keep your yaps shut."

Don's ear twitched at that particular statement but he grinned anyway, a flash of dawn creeping through the windows behind him, "I give you my word of course!"

"Good, this leaks and you won't work in this town again," the engineer growled. "You've never seen anything like this, it'll be bigger than anything out there when it's done. Here, today we're just painting the assembly lines on the floor..."

"Men! Get the Brushes! Not you Mad Dog, you get the paint, NOW!" Hah! That last word snapped out well didn't it? Practice would make perfect surely! They were certainly moving like he was worth listening to! Haha! "So, tell me about this...plane?"

"Heh, yeah, you're a brat," the engineer snorted. "It'll be a damn ship. Planes'll be damn toys. Start pacing, give me...hell, you're short, give me a ninety count with your legs in a straight line."

"A ship..." Don mused, turning to pace. "That has a good sound yes?" Oh yes.


End file.
